SIX YEARS OLD

Used baby Nolan's and Daddy's hand for this shot, love it, perfect in every way!

Six years ago on May 13, 2006 it was the fishing opener in MN, it was my first pregnancy, our first baby and the first grand baby on my side.  It was exciting to say the least.  I remember it as if it were yesterday and if it weren't for my big boy who now likes fart jokes more than cuddling, I would think it was just last year.  Graham has always since the day he was born, been a dynamic force.  He was a gorgeous baby, I know I know we all say that, but really he had a full head of hair, thick black hair and huge lips, he was stunning.  And well, with good looks didn't come good temperament.  He screamed A LOT.  It was overwhelming for me, I mean come on, I had this all figured out, planned out, how to be the perfect mom and well, having a baby that screamed the majority of the day, that wasn't part of it.  I look back now on those times and wonder how I was so exhausted, I mean one baby, how hard could it have been?

But, truth be told, he WAS that difficult and navigating motherhood on top of a challenging child not a good combo.  I would do a whole lot of things differently, let's just say I wouldn't be patting his butt saying SHHHHHH at 2AM when he is 10 months old and all is right, I would now simply shut the door and turn my fan on high, you learn that later.  The more babies that come, you learn they survive and more importantly with a full nights sleep you are a better mother for taking care of your needs as well as theirs.  But, we all go through it, the phase of that first baby and first time parent, it is such an essential phase and also, so predictable.  You see them coming a mile away, going into Target with a stroller??? Yep, the big one, with a HUGE diaper bag, larger than most carry-on luggages and the dad looks frazzled as the mom is giving him "the look".....it's kind of fun for me to watch now, as they dote every aisle over their baby who is no more than a month old but garnishes more attention than all three of my children...we were all there.  It was my hardest transition as a parent going from zero to one baby.  I am sure Graham's determined, loud personality had a lot to do with that, but your life as you know it is never the same.  Ever.  So, as you add others into your family, for me personally, it is WAY easier and not only that, more enjoyable and I am a better parent.  After all, you can't be so neurotic with three or four kids, you simply don't have the time to make 4 different homemade smoothies and make sure everyone has their favorite color cup, nope those demands are left at the wayside and as we like to say around here, "you get what you get and you don't throw a fit!"

It makes for better parenting and well better kids, your needs must wait sometimes, you learn compromise, sharing, helping, essential life skills at an early age, I love the chaos of a full house of young kids, well until about 430 then it's all rather downhill, I can only take so much!

Either way, thinking back to that time and those days of early motherhood, it fills me full, knowing my life's journey was really just beginning, that the layers of armor and walls of protectiveness were being slowly broken down with every squeak and giggle, they melt you, your babies, melt you into puddles of love day by day.  It's a good thing.  A really good thing.  And my sweet Graham, he has always melted me.  He's also fried my brain, broken my heart and made me question just about every parenting technique known to man....he's an original.  But, in the end, he is the sweetest dang kid ever.  Evidenced by his birthday morning.  Graham has been asking for a Nintendo DS since about November, he asked Santa for one, and I told him I wrote him a letter telling him I didn't want him to have it until he was 8....I know I am a buzz kill, but seriously I feel like our children are so blessed and it is getting into spoiled territory and it makes my stomach turn.  So, I prepared him for MONTHS, there is no 3DS Graham, you are NOT getting one, he would always try to bargain when, maybe when I am 7 mama? No, 8, that is it!  So, day after day, he asked, he didn't ask for ONE thing outside of that for his 6th birthday and well his daddy caved, wanted to buy it, felt like he waited long enough, over 8 months and he doesn't act spoiled "all the time"...LOL....

so, I broke slowly after talking with Jeremy and devised a plan, that I would wrap the tiny little presents I had gotten Graham for the morning of his birthday and he would open those and then in different wrapping paper Jeremy would say, "wait there is something more" and I would act appalled and shocked and the kids would laugh and say how great daddy was, because nothing is better for kids then their mommy being the "bad guy" who gets one pulled over on her for once!  So, that morning Graham woke to his 4 little presents wrapped, and I mean LITTLE, a couple of Pokemon pads of paper, two pirate plastic squirt guns, a $1 pirate map and tiny Pokemon figurine, nothing spectacular, nothing great, that was that...he opened each one squealing with joy.  He was thrilled, said how awesome it all was, ran to hug me and thank me.  And then proceeded to give Audrey one of the notebooks and squirt guns and say, "it's only fair that I share with Audrey..." My heart melted, skipped a beat and I felt good that I had listened to his daddy and caved and bought the 3DS.  So, with that, about an hour later, I cued Jeremy and out he came with another package....Graham's eyes lit up, and I dropped my mouth and said how I couldn't believe Daddy did that without me knowing, and Graham and Audrey laughed and laughed and he hugged Jeremy so tight and just kept saying you are the BEST DADDY....Jeremy of course felt badly that I took the hit, but I didn't.  I like it that way.  I know my boy adores his mama, I don't need gift kudos and I think it was perfect in every way.

We do parties big around here and since I am so hugely preggo it was our first cop out party at Pump it Up, it was a blast and 22 kids had the time of their lives, and as parents we didn't have to really do a dang thing except enjoy it!  

After the party and festivities we had a ton of fun playing with some of our new toys and the night vision goggles and spy kits were a hit!  For not only the 6 year old! :)

Happy 6th Birthday to the boy who made me a mama, you are my first, my big boy.  I love you more than any words could do justice and have learned a plethora of lessons on love, thank you for filling my heart full and always making every day an exciting adventure, we love you G-MAN!