firsts

So you ever hear people talk about their kids and as a kid yourself think that your parents had a favorite?  That they really loved your brother or sister maybe a little bit more than you?  I personally haven't wondered this in my own life.  I felt that my favorite child title fluctuated, when I was younger and quiet and sweet, (I know hard to imagine!) my mom and I did most everything together and suppose you could have guessed I was her favorite.  Now, my dad and I have a bond that is indescribable and real and deep, you could say that I am his favorite.  I heard somewhere that when you ask a child, "who do you think mommy's favorite is?" They should answer themselves.  Graham did, Audrey said Nolan...hmmmm better work on that.

I have been thinking about this because Graham read his FIRST book last night.  I don't mean every other word, or stumbling to pronounce things so long that you dose off or you might rip your eyeballs out waiting, LOL!  I mean, read it.  Every word and every page start to finish and it was glorious.  Jeremy walked in on him reading and paused looked at me and was like, "seriously is that kid reading that just like that?"  I was shaking my head furiously up and down and not wanting to interrupt surely the most important moment of his life!  He was beaming with pride as he turned each page giving me a high five and so happy that HE was doing it.  Graham has always been a bright kid, curious and uber imaginative.  He was born this way, along with a few stressful quirky personality traits as well, (read other posts!).  But, it was one of those things that we could have pushed, taught him ourselves, worked with him on more, you know the type.  The teach your baby to read type.  I purposely didn't with Graham, one because we butt heads naturally and I didn't want him to grow frustrated from learning because of ME!  And also because that is what school is for right?  To teach our kids.  We forget this sometimes in our society that kids can learn at a kid pace and that's just fine.  I don't want him to read at a 4th grade level in Kindergarten he'd be bored silly and I like him to be challenged and given the appropriate pushing and when it all unfolds so nicely, like three months in to school and voila, my 5 year old can read!  Just proud of him and excited, so fun those moments that come along once in a lifetime.  Watching your child turn their gears just so in their little minds and end up with the answers.  It's magic and makes all the hours of time outs and tantrum filled days worth it.

So, as I was going to bed last night filled with pride, I paused a moment and thought, geez this is what kind of sucks for the middle kid.  I've been noticing it more as Audrey gets older, this whole middle thing kind of blows!  I mean, Graham goes to preschool and we can't wait a NEW adventure for us too, the first time on the bus, the first tooth, the first steps, the first bike ride, he kind of steals the dang show!  I think that is natural, I mean he's our first.  I always thought sweet Audrey would hold her own special place as my first girl and only girl for that matter and I loved that, I wished Nolan was a boy, so Audrey would have a special place despite being a middle child.  It's funny thought, because inevitably she falls into the middle.  I rush her to school, don't chat with the moms as long, don't volunteer as much, don't bring everything perfect, don't think about what to pack in her lunch, or how to practice her alphabet sounds, I mean, she just kind of gets shuffled between Nolan's therapies and needs and Graham's firsts and goes along with the ride.  Is this all bad?  I hope not.  I don't think so.  I mean, Jeremy is a middle and he is awesome.  He learned how to get along with pretty much anybody, make due in any situation, be flexible, positive and happy.  I would say Ms. Audrey is all of those things.  I do try to carve out special "girl time" and do only "girly" things with her.  Letting her know we have a bond like no other. A phrase we say to the boys in the house..."boys drool and girls rule!"  I know, I know not the most polite thing in the world, but it's ours.  Just us girls.

So, I don't know, I don't think I have a favorite.  I think I have a favorite big boy, who is learning like a sponge and impresses me every day with something new.  I have a favorite sweet girl who shares and considers others like no one else.  I have a favorite little baby that warms and melts my soul.  And let's be honest those favorites fall from grace as quickly as they rise.  You won't find me to be a mom that doesn't sell them out.  I mean Graham can scream and fight over NOTHING better than anyone I have EVER met, no I am not kidding, that kid can be nuts!  Audrey can pout and whine and you swear some alien has possessed her little body, but believe it, she can turn on you.  And well, Nolan, I got nothin on him, he's too dang sweet and little to do anything wrong as of yet.  Give it time, his new favorite behavior is biting and pulling out electrical cords...umm yeah, not good.  I haven't mustered up the anger or fear or irritation yet to say NOOOOOO like I would to my others, because come on, the kid can crawl and that is so dang cool, I can't get mad!!!!!  So how about you?  What do you think about this favorite kid thing?  Do you have one?